"L, is for the way you look at me." Love songs aren't the only way to get that loving feeling. Oxytocin, also known as "the love hormone," is critical in shaping our social behaviors and emotional responses. Just like a love song, it's famous for facilitating bonding, enhancing emotional connections, and promoting feelings of contentment and security. This hormone’s influence extends beyond mere romantic interactions, playing a significant part in maternal behaviors, friendships, and even trust between colleagues. Learn more about how to drink from the fountain of Oxytocin, that delicious love hormone.
Why it’s important and what it does
Admittedly, I talk about Oxytocin a bit tongue in cheek, but it's kinda a big deal. It's the hormone that keeps you from eating your young, when you are sleep deprived and they won't stop crying, after birth. Oxytocin conveys a vast array of effects on the human body and mind. It fosters bonding between mothers and their newborns, between partners, and within groups. These bonds reinforce the social constructs that humans rely on. Even when it isn't "love," Oxytocin, the love hormone, is hard at work. Moreover, oxytocin reduces stress and anxiety by lowering cortisol levels. It also helps in pain management by eliciting anti-inflammatory effects, allieviating discomfort. Its' role in emotional regulation is pivotal, as well. For instance, increased oxytocin levels are linked to feelings of happiness and reduced feelings of loneliness.
But wait, there's more! It's especially important during childbirth. Oxytocin helps spur uterine contractions during childbirth and lets down milk for nursing. It's also critical in creating the mother-child bond, many mothers are familiar with (remember my earlier comment about eating your young). There is a lot of research happening currently, studying the relationship between low oxytocin and postpartum depression, as well. We see Oxytocin in many facets of our lives - especially women.
Where it is produced
Oxytocin is synthesized in the hypothalamus, a small but crucial part of the brain, linking the nervous system to the hormonal system, via the pituitary gland. This is all part of the HPA-Axis (Hypothalamus, Pituitary, Adrenal Axis), which is crucial for our overall health. The production and release of oxytocin are tightly regulated by the brain to ensure appropriate responses to social stimuli or stress. It's also a positive feedback loop, meaning that the oxytocin causes a certain action, and through that action, more oxytocin is released. For example, during sex you release Oxytocin and as you orgasm, you release more oxytocin. It's a virtuous cycle, under most circumstances.
How to boost your oxytocin levels
Increasing your oxytocin levels can help enhance your emotional well-being and strengthen your social bonds. Check out these ideas for boosting your oxytocin naturally:
Physical Touch
Engaging in warm, friendly touches like hugs or handshakes can increase oxytocin. This simple act is powerful in strengthening bonds and reducing stress. You can see benefits after holding a hug for just 20 seconds. This is part of the reason my partner and I love to give long languid hugs. It's so good for the brain and nervous system.
Socializing
Quality time with friends and family boosts oxytocin levels, enhancing a sense of belonging and emotional security. Think of how you feel after a warm afternoon at the family BBQ. I'm talking about the fun kind of BBQ full of stories, laughter, and the shrill cries of kiddos having a great time in the sprinkler. If your BBQs are more like Uncle Frank getting drunk and throwing up on the grill, then maybe go to a friend's BBQ instead.
Pets
Pets are always a fan favorite for increasing oxytocin, that luscious love hormone. Interacting with animals, especially pets like dogs and cats, can raise oxytocin levels, providing comfort and reducing stress. I haven't looked for any studies, but I imagine cuddling with your snake could be as fulfilling as cuddling with something fuzzy. The important thing is making the connection with another living thing.
Listening to Music
How many of you go for a drive, put your favorite song on, sing at the top of your lungs and immediately feel better? This is likely the oxytocin doing it's thing. Music has been shown to elevate oxytocin, possibly contributing to its ability to improve mood and social connectivity. I like to imagine Christina Applegate in "Dead to Me," getting in her car and singing death metal when she feels especially stressed out. It doesn't matter your tune - just put it on and go for it. You will probably feel better.
Exercise
Like most our our happy hormones [1,2,3], exercise is high on the list. Oxytocin, the love hormone, is no different. Physical activities, particularly those in groups, like yoga or team sports, can increase oxytocin, promoting feelings of togetherness and well-being.
How's your love hormone level?
Incorporating activities that increase oxytocin can lead to a richer, more connected life. Feeling down or unmotivated? Boost one of those happy hormones. Need to pump up the volume on the Oxytocin? Look to physical touch, quality time with loved ones, or engaging in group activities. Enhancing your oxytocin level is a pathway to better emotional health and stronger relationships. How is your love hormone level? Need a hug? While I can only send virtual hugs, I'm always here for a conversation. Book a free breakthrough session to see how you can hype up your happy hormones for better wellbeing. Feeling a bit too touchy-feely? Subscribe to this substack where paid subscribers can read personal stories about my own wellbeing journey or check out Wellspiration for all the wellbeing content. Regardless, I’m so glad you’re here!
Until then, I'm rooting for you and wishing you abundant health and limitless joy.
Resources
Aguilar-Raab, C., Eckstein, M., Geracitano, S., Prevost, M., Gold, I., Heinrichs, M., Bilderbeck, A., Ehlert, U., & Ditzen, B. (2019). Oxytocin Modulates the Cognitive Appraisal of the Own and Others Close Intimate Relationships. Frontiers in neuroscience, 13, 714. https://doi.org/10.3389/fnins.2019.00714
LeWine, Howard E., MD. "Oxytocin: The Love Hormone." Harvard Health Blog. 2023. https://www.health.harvard.edu/mind-and-mood/oxytocin-the-love-hormone
Torpor, David R., PhD, MS-HPEd. "Preventing depression in pregnancy: New guidelines." Harvard Health Blog. 2019. https://www.health.harvard.edu/blog/preventing-depression-in-pregnancy-new-guidelines-2019032616263
Grewen, K. M., Anderson, B. J., Girdler, S. S., & Light, K. C. (2003). Warm partner contact is related to lower cardiovascular reactivity. Behavioral medicine (Washington, D.C.), 29(3), 123–130. https://doi.org/10.1080/08964280309596065